Ugly grandma names: Ugly old female names

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Ugly Baby Names (And Names So Ugly They’re Actually Cute)

Is there such a thing as an ugly baby name?

Like all things beauty, the beauty of a name is in the eye (ear?) of the beholder. This post is not at all meant to insult anyone with these names or anyone who chose these names.

I’m sure there are many lovely people in the world with all of these names.

That said, there are some names that are either harsh sounding or have some feature about them that sounds unpleasant to a lot of English speakers.

Some of these names are just plain ugly. I’m sorry, but I can’t get behind a little Gertrude or Gretchen.

Other names are strattling the line between ugly and cute. Like the pugs of baby names, it is precisely their awkward, quasi-ugliness which makes them endearing.

Or at least that was my whole argument during my first pregnancy, when I begged and begged my husband to agree to the name Mabel.

“It’s ugly,” my husband said.

“But it’s so ugly, it’s cute!” I argued.

I was unable to convince him of that one, but let’s see if I can convince anyone of these so-ugly-they’re-cute baby names.

As much as I hate to be a jerk, first we need to separate the just-plain-ugly names from the ugly-but-cute names.

Ugly baby names for girls

You might be able to create a little girl gorgeous enough to pull off one of these. But I don’t recommend trying.

(And if you had your heart set on one of these, remember there’s always the middle name spot!)

Ursula

I don’t know if Disney called the sea witch Ursula because it’s ugly, or if we just think of it as ugly because of the sea witch. But that’s not important.

Gretchen

Some people truly like this name. All I hear is the “retch”. And vomit is pretty much the ugliest possible thing.

Gertrude

It doesn’t roll off the tongue, that’s for sure. The sound is just unappealing.

Mildred

I highly doubt anyone reading this was ever considering naming their baby Mildred. So for that, I thank you.

Irma

I’ll tell you what Irma is the perfect name for: a horrid, destructive, category 5 hurricane. Let’s keep it that way.

Helga

The name Helga peaked in 1899, and unlike some old-fashioned baby names, it should stay buried.

Virginia

What if the kid ends up with a speech impediment and goes around calling herself Vagina??? That’s a risk I’m not willing to take.

Bernadette

I know some cool people with the name Bernadette, but honestly I’ve always wondered what in the world their parents were thinking.

Myrtle

Myrtle is just begging to be made into a joke. Is the joke fertile Myrtle? Myrtle the turtle? I don’t even know. But it’s there.

Barbara

This name sounds like words that aren’t at all feminine. Barber, barbarian… nothing cute or sweet about those. And the nickname Barbie would just be cruel.

Esther

Esther isn’t rolling off anyone’s tongue. The “s” followed by “th” combo takes serious effort.

Greer

Another name that’s hard to say. Greer is reminiscent of the sound an angry cat makes.

Fern

If you’re into nature names, there are so many more beautiful choices out there. Violet, Rose, Lily, Meadow, Autumn, Ivy… there’s no need to use harsh-sounding Fern.

Delores

Remember the episode of Seinfeld about the name that rhymes with a female body part?

Bertha

The first word that comes to mind when I hear Bertha is “big”. Do you want your daughter to be “Big Bertha”?

Any overly froo-froo made up name

Honestly I’d prefer any of the aforementioned unattractive or old lady names on this list over some of the nonsense people make up. Brynlynn, Eliannalee, and Amylbella just don’t need to happen.

Names that are ugly cute

Mabel

My favorite of the ugly-cute names, it has an old-lady vibe but isn’t too weird or unpleasant sounding.

Martha

A cute little girl could totally rock Martha. Sure it’s old, but in a classic/historical way. Don’t we all have a bit of affection towards Martha Washington?

Ingrid

It’s definitely dancing on the ugly-cute line, but the uniqueness has some appeal.

Enid

Girls names that start with “E” are all the rage now. Maybe Enid will be next?

Agatha

Yes, I would be surprised if the next birth announcement I received was for sweet little baby Agatha. But there is definitely something ballsy about it. No one would want to mess with Agatha.

Ida

The uber-popular name Ava has caused a subsequent surge in the popularity of Ada. It’s only logical that Ida will be the next step.

Henrietta

This name makes a statement! It’s bold, but with a feminine side. I can picture a super cute little Henrie or even Etta with this name.

Georgina

All variations of George are on the rise since the birth of Prince William and Duchess Kate’s son George. Georgina is just as good of a female version as Georgia, so don’t shy away!

Matilda

It feels a little dated and possibly a little nerdy, but if you don’t think about it too hard it’s pretty cute.

Edith

Edith would fall on the good side of old lady names, not the ugly.

Wilhelmina

Go big or go home! Wilhelmina is a great formal name choice for cute nicknames like Willie or Willa.

Elna

With the Frozen-explosion dying down, people are starting to break away from the name Elsa. Elna would be a likely replacement hitter.

Ugly boy names

Why has this whole post been focused on girls names? I have no idea.

I’m an equal opportunity name snob and there is certainly no shortage of ugly baby names for boys. Here are just a few:

Milton

Nerd alert! There is nothing cute about Milton. Martin would be a more appealing alternative.

Bruce

If you’re hoping your baby boy comes out of the womb with a beard, try this name.

Earl

It sounds like whining even if you aren’t trying to.

Virgil

Virgil is a different style than most names, but not in a good way. If you’re looking for unique baby names, I’ve got much better!

Buford

I can’t put my finger on what makes Buford ugly. But I have a feeling I’m not alone.

Adolf

No explanation needed. Pick another name.

Angus

In addition to the association with beef, Angus has a uniquely unappealing sound.

Elmer

Elmer Fudd, Elmer’s glue… can’t think of anything cute about Elmer.

Eugene

Eugene Fitzherbert knew what he was doing when he changed his name to Flynn Ryder. (If you picked up on that reference, you should definitely check out my list of Disney-inspired boy names).

I know you’ve all heard of more ugly baby names! Let’s hear them in the comments.

«Old Lady» names which should never see the light of day ever again

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Baby names

385 replies

MrsSchadenfreude ·

11/03/2010 21:21

In my opinion. I give you:

Ethel
Enid
Edna
Doris
Maud(e)
Hilda
Ena
Elsie
Gladys

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Maize ·

11/03/2010 21:24

Elsie is tres popular these days.

Ethel is hideous. Its my nana’s name and she is 86 and she thinks its old fashioned!

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kikid ·

11/03/2010 21:25

? where have you been….

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overmydeadbody ·

11/03/2010 21:26

Ethel and Agnes and Dorothy and Betty

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Narketta ·

11/03/2010 21:27

Fanny
Mable
Phyliss

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Ondine ·

11/03/2010 21:27

I agree with Betty, also;

Olive
Mildred
Primrose
Millicent
Muriel
Myrtle

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pollywollydoodle ·

11/03/2010 21:27

beryl
evadne
rita
mavis

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msrisotto ·

11/03/2010 21:29

vera
phyllis

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Fimbow ·

11/03/2010 21:29

Eileen/Aileen
Phyllis
Marjorie
Eumphemia
Gloria
Henrietta
Muriel
Sheila
Sheena
Roberta
Cis sie

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TheCrackFox ·

11/03/2010 21:30

Doreen
Winifred

(I like Betty, Elsie, Olive and Mable)

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Fimbow ·

11/03/2010 21:31

And yucky non feminine equivilent of boys names i. e.

Thomasina
Nigella
etc

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MrsSchadenfreude ·

11/03/2010 21:32

I mean, do they conjure up a glamorous, beautiful or strong person? No. An old lady with wrinkly tights who smells of wee.

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bananamumma ·

11/03/2010 21:32

In general I think that the old lady chic trend is a bit naff now.

These names will date exactly like they did before.

I do like some of the more mainsteam ones though.

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MyCatIsABastard ·

11/03/2010 21:33

Ermintrude
Gertrude
Swanhilde
Doris

Have to say I think Elsie is v pretty (it was my Granny’s name though)

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MrsvWoolf ·

11/03/2010 21:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster’s request.

MrsvWoolf ·

11/03/2010 21:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster’s request.

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BitOfFun ·

11/03/2010 21:52

I rather like lots of these actually. Evadne sounds quite hip.

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seeker ·

11/03/2010 21:54

I like Maud!

Agatha
Beryl
Noreen
Gladys — particularly if spelled Gwladys
Hilda
Euphemia
Eustacia
Myrtle
Agnes — and Senga
Philomena

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choosyfloosy ·

11/03/2010 21:55

I love Blanche, Dorothy, Roberta and Elsie (the latter because of What Katy Did). I’d agree with you about the others, but I’ll bet you a fiver we all have grandchildren with these names!!

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jojochanel ·

11/03/2010 21:57

OK so honestly tell me what you think of Joan as a middle name. It’s my gran’s name so I’d like to use it cos of her but I’m not sure if it’s too old lady…..

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piscesmoon ·

11/03/2010 21:59

Elsie
Freda
Ethel
Maud
Mavis
Winifred
Doris
Minnie
Mildred
Gladys
Pearl
Beryl
Olive
Ena
Edna
Enid

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piscesmoon ·

11/03/2010 22:00

Forgot
Hilda
Muriel
Gertrude
Mabel
Ruby

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choosyfloosy ·

11/03/2010 22:01

Joan is due a massive comeback (may already be having one). Joan of Arc, Joan Greenwood, Joanie and Chachi (joke). Not old lady any more.

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Cadelaide ·

11/03/2010 22:03

Mildred is a lovely name.

My neighbour has just called her baby Nora.

Nora?

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pranma ·

11/03/2010 22:04

How can anyone not like Dorothy,Marjorie,Elsie or Ruby?
I hate Norah
Norma
Ada
Vera

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What names infuriate and irritate you?

#1

#2

9 0015 August 15, 2018 13:30

#3

#4

#5

Guest

someone else’s name? Poor…

#6

#7

90 006 #8

Guest

Victoria, Angelina, Alina, Sonya Sergey, Nikolai , Anatoly, Vasily

#9

Guest

Yarik, it seems that the name itself is not bad, but it infuriates. when I hear from the side, bleat hunting. Milana-p\sdets.

#10

#11

#12

#13 August 15, 2018, 13:39

#15

#16

Guest

Bogdan, Gleb, Rodion, Platon, Elisha

#17

Guest

It’s good that you are so indiscriminate. You would be called a bucket and you would proudly wear this title. Well, yes! It’s easier to live that way. 15 August 2018

#19

Guest

The names Varvara, Polina, Ulyana infuriate me.
Ilya, Plato, Matvey, Makar, Daniel.

#20

#21

#22

Experts Woman. en

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#23

#24

#25

#26

Author

The names Varvara, Polina, Ulyana annoy me.
Ilya, Plato, Matvey, Makar, Daniel.

Uninvented stories

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#28

#29

#30

#31

.

#32

#35

#36

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    #39

    #40

    #41

    #42

    #43

    #44

    #45

    #46

    #47

    #48

    #49

    #50

    Beautiful parents and an ugly child.

    Or vice versa. Do you know cases?

    #1

    #2

    I have such a question. And if one parent has a Slavic type of appearance (blue eyes, chestnut hair, very fair skin), and the other parent has an oriental appearance (dark eyes, chocolate hair, skin is not swarthy, but rather olive), what is the probability that they will have a child with a Slavic appearance type? Very interesting. Tell me if anyone knows examples.

    #3

    #4

    Guest

    author sorry to get into your topic.

    I have such a question. And if one parent has a Slavic type of appearance (blue eyes, chestnut hair, very fair skin), and the other parent has an oriental appearance (dark eyes, chocolate hair, skin is not swarthy, but rather olive), what is the probability that they will have a child with a Slavic appearance type? Very interesting. Tell me if anyone knows examples.

    #5

    #6

    won, Celentano and his wife are such a beautiful couple, but they have no children. they didn’t go to father or mother, neither beauty nor talents.

    #7

    Mirka

    mestizos usually turn out beautiful.

    won, Celentano and his wife, such a beautiful couple, but they have no children. they didn’t go to father or mother, neither beauty nor talents.

    #8

    #9

    90 597 December 25, 2010 07:06 PM

    #10

    So here I am — ordinary. Unless the mother’s figure is a thin waist, pronounced chest and hips. The face is completely normal. Despite the classic beauty of dad and the bright beauty of mom.

    I’m 20.

    So appearance doesn’t really depend on parents.

    #11

    Mirka

    won, Celentano and his wife, such a beautiful couple, but they have no children. they didn’t go to father or mother, neither beauty nor talents.

    #12

    #13

    #14

    #16

    #17

    9 0005

    #18

    Guest

    I know too. Mom is beautiful, dad handsome, and the daughter is a blond, rough-voiced chuchundra.

    #19

    #21

    #22

    #23

    — Nothing))

    I often notice that there are pretty children with quite ordinary parents and ugly children with beautiful parents. Apparently, nature is resting — either on parents or on children))

    Woman.ru experts

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      Psychologist

      36 answers

    • Vladimir Weiss

      Neopsychologist

      215 answers

    • Sergey Katyshev

      Nutritionist

      105 answers

    • Maria Burlakova

      Psychologist

      390 answers

    • Dmitry Olegovich Surotkin

      Psychotherapist

      40 answers

    • Vera Vladimirovna Zolotykh

      Psychologist

      149 answers

    • Shchipko Ekaterina

      Psychologist-sexologist

      44 answers

    • Shakhova Natali

      Psychologist-consultant

      22 answers

    • Egor Mazurok

      Clinical psychologist

      22 answers

    • Sadovnikov Ernest

      Psychologist. …

      229 answers

    #24

    Guest

    I have such a question. And if one parent has a Slavic type of appearance (blue eyes, chestnut hair, very fair skin), and the other parent has an oriental appearance (dark eyes, chocolate hair, skin is not swarthy, but rather olive), what is the probability that they will have a child with a Slavic appearance type? Very interesting. Tell me if anyone knows examples.

    #25

    In short, I know the reverse example. Mother father is very beautiful, and your sons are terrible to the point of impossible.

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    Author, did you grow up on a desert island? Almost all children are beautiful and pretty, and then they start to get scared.

    #30

    #31

    Zyaba

    Lyubov Polishchuk has a daughter…well, let’s not talk about sad things..

    #32

    #33

    my parents are beautiful, and I’m like a grandmother went(((

    #36

    Guest

    author sorry to get into your topic. I have such a question. And if one parent has a Slavic type of appearance (blue eyes, chestnut hair, very fair skin), and the other parent has an oriental appearance (dark eyes, chocolate hair, skin is not swarthy, but rather olive), what is the probability that they will have a child with a Slavic appearance type? Very interesting. Tell me if anyone knows examples.

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    #39

    #40

    #41

    #42

    Guest

    there are no ugly children, all children are pretty, funny, then they grow up to be crocodiles, perhaps because they are not loved, or they did not want at all. December 28, 2010 or not at all wanted.

    #44

    #45

    Guest

    author sorry to get into your topic.

    I have such a question. And if one parent has a Slavic type of appearance (blue eyes, chestnut hair, very fair skin), and the other parent has an oriental appearance (dark eyes, chocolate hair, skin is not swarthy, but rather olive), what is the probability that they will have a child with a Slavic appearance type? Very interesting. Tell me if anyone knows examples.

    #46

    And I also have friends who are not handsome, to put it mildly. Both have big noses, she is plump and he is skinny. And their daughter is very beautiful. She looks like a dad; probably, the features of the father’s face look bad on a man’s face, but good on a woman’s. But this girl is just a doll. Although now, when she is growing up (she is 6-8 years old), she becomes less beautiful. Before, it was impossible to take your eyes off.

    #47

    #48

    S┐P╪P╫PёS┤P╨P╟

    90 006 Mirkausually mestizos turn out beautiful.

    won, Celentano and his wife, such a beautiful couple, but they have no children. they didn’t go to father or mother, neither beauty nor talents.

    of course I love Celentano very much, but where is he handsome? 🙂 like a monkey)

    #50

    Guest

    Guest

    author sorry to get into your topic. I have such a question. And if one parent has a Slavic type of appearance (blue eyes, chestnut hair, very fair skin), and the other parent has an oriental appearance (dark eyes, chocolate hair, skin is not swarthy, but rather olive), what is the probability that they will have a child with a Slavic appearance type? Very interesting.

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